Disclaimer: These are just jokes. They are supposed to be taken seriously as jokes. There’s no malicious intent. Chill.

When I think of Indian television advertisements (ads) from the 90s till the 2010s, multiple stories start playing in my head. Yes, ‘stories’ and not ‘ads’. Think of Humara Bajaj, Fevicol ka jod, Kuch meetha ho jayein…. These were nothing short of short films. The Nerolac ad or the Nirma ad could even be termed mini musicals. Comparatively, today’s ads are not even teasers! So, why aren’t Indian TV ads like old times?

It’s all templated

For a particular category, most of the ads today follow a template. There’s a guy. He uses the product. He gets the girl. That’s it. The rest of the population doesn’t exist. So much for inclusivity.

It’s so bad that if they don’t show the product, it would be difficult to tell if the ad is for a chocolate, deo, or condoms!

Too much Vitamin C

Certain cosmetics ads are facing a unique issue — category misplacement. Apparently, every other cream has Vitamin C, this fruit extract, and that natural essence. All this is confusing.

Now, I don’t know whether to apply the cream on my face or to apply it on bread and eat it! What, it has Vitamin C, doesn’t it?

The IPL madness

Things always get wild with the IPL. Earlier, a catch was a catch. But with IPL, it’s a Karbonn Kamaal Catch. A six is not just a six but a DLF maximum. I worry about what’s coming next.

The commentary might soon be like — Jasprit ‘Dream 11’ Bumrah bowls to Virat ‘MRF’ Kohli who edges it Rohit ‘Nissan’ Sharma.

And it might get worse. The cricketers’ jerseys are already cramped with sponsor logos. With the lack of advertising space, they might just paste a brand sticker on the players’ foreheads. Imagine the great MS Dhoni with a ‘Go Daddy’ sticker on his forehead. Terrible! Hope it never happens.

From TV to digital

Nowadays, there’s a new arena for advertisers to play in — the digital space. And this digital space is ever evolving. We have gone from Shaadi.com to Tinder at a rapid pace; it’s the era of instant gratification. And this reflects in the ads we see on YouTube also.

Five seconds is all the advertisers have to persuade you; otherwise, you will press the Skip Ad button, which is conspicuously missing these days.

So, obviously there’s no time for foreplay — setting the scene for a story to unfold. And if it doesn’t last more than five seconds, then it ought to be bad. Right, ladies? Wink, wink.

So, the answer to the question ‘why aren’t Indian TV ads like old times’ is perhaps that the times have changed!

OTT for ads

We are in the age of Over the Top (OTT) platforms like Netflix, Amazon Prime Video, and so on. Maybe, it’s time for an advertising-focussed OTT platform. Imagine an OTT platform that hosts only ads. It will be like old times, and storytelling in ads will be back!

This OTT platform will subscribe to you, the viewer, based on your interests. It will pay you in points that can be encashed when buying other products/services. The more ads you watch, the more points you get. And if you happen to buy a product using the points, their advertisement will be validated.

It's a win-win-win situation for everyone. Us users get to view interesting advertisements of categories that we want, the sellers get to sell products and services to a targeted audience, and the OTT platform profits from connecting the users and the sellers.

I know this is a fantasy, but at least it’s not templated!

---

Author’s note: If you liked what you read, then please share this article with someone who you think will also like it! Sharing is caring.

I am an independent creator and it would be great if you could support my work. The amount doesn’t matter as much as your gesture! Hit support to show some love.